Know That You Know and Say What You Feel

"You know what!? I dont understand why i have to repent to a God for something i'm not sorry for! Why do i have to repent for living my life?!!" ...


...


... How do I answer this?





Just a couple of months ago i found myself asking this question. i was in art class surrounded by my, well, anything BUT Christian friends after they had just insulted my savior in every way possible. Before we had already gotten into a religious debate and it led to absolutely NOWHERE. dead end. except for frustration and hurt feelings. i knew it was up to me whether or not it would lead there again. How could i answer this? I took a deep breath and tried to see past my anger. God give me the words to say, please tell me what to say. I looked into the irritated face staring back at me and raised my eyebrow and replied simply, "You don't have to."


I watched as my friend's face changed from angry, to surprised, to confused, to interested.


"What?"


"I said you dont have to. What's the point if you really aren't sorry?"


"..."


"See, it's all about the condition of your heart. you could repent right now and say 'Oh Great Lord of Heaven! Forgive me for my treacherous sin!' but if you dont really mean it, that's another precious breath of yours wasted. The reason why people repent, or should, is because they are truly regretful of the wrong thing the knew they just did and want to make it right. but if you're doing it just 'cuz you know you should, then...what's the point...?"



Ever thought about that? How the things you do are based on the condition of your heart? i said this before i thought about it. How many times do i repent because i know i should, not because i truly want forgiveness? If i'm not truly sorry, i'm just as guilty as my athiest friend. So i guess that's something to think about.