What's That Supposed to Mean?

So, you may be wondering why in the world i decided to name my blog Finding Myself in Finding Guatemala. Well originally, when i first saw the advertisement for the trip, i just felt really compelled to go. i was like "Wow, this will be great; oodles of fun!" but when my mother started telling people about it she's say "i didn't even ask her if she wanted to do this. she came up to me and said 'mommy, i want to go on this trip' " That's when i realized that it must have been something special for me to go to my mother and tell her that this is what i feel like i need to be doing. Many instances since has happened that allowed me to find out more about myself. i know that may sound a little conceited, but it's important to know who you are. In finding this trip to Guatemala, it's not just some thing like i thought, it's turning into a soul search. i've been going through alot in this passed year in a half, and i lost who i was. i had lost the desire to fulfill the calling that God had placed over my life because of all the struggles and pain and bitterness. I became a new person that i didn't recognize, and i hated her. but now, since i found this trip, i'm beginning to see who this new person is, and see that she's not so bad after all.